Indian Ocean

Today we took Miranda for her first visit to the ocean.  It was also my first time to see the Indian Ocean.  The water was a beautiful blue and the waves were huge.  It was also quite windy.  The beach was very large with fine sand; unfortunately, the strong wind blew the sand.   I took Miranda down to the water’s edge but she was scared of the waves and wanted me to hold her.

There were permanent bamboo umbrella structures along the beach so we sat in the shade and played with the sand toys.  This was much more to Miranda’s liking and she had fun mixing the sand and water in a bucket. 

We played for a while and then Miranda got up and put all the sand toys back in the bag.  I took this as a signal that she was tired and spread out a beach towel for her.  She laid down for a nap but the sand was blowing in her face.  So, I positioned myself as a wind barrier for her and that allowed her to take a brief nap.  After her nap we played again in the sand and I took her back to the water.  This time she stood in the sand as a wave came up and swirled around her feet.  She seemed to like it but didn’t want to do it again.  We continued to play in the sand until she got up and put the toys in the bag a second time.  This time she even took a sand toy that Dad was playing with and put it back in the bag!  Then she put on her flip-flops and picked up my flip-flops and brought them to me.  We got the hint that she was ready to go!

We ate lunch at a Wimpy restaurant (I think we have this chain in the US, too).  When the waiter brought our food Miranda was very excited and immediately folded her hands to pray.  The waiter noticed this and commented that she was ready to say grace.  Then he stood by our table while we got ready to pray.  We weren’t sure what he was doing, but then the waiter prayed and thanked God for our food and that it would bless our family!  Wow!  That’s quite the service.  I’ve never had a waiter pray over our food for us. 

Afterwards, another patron came up to talk to us and he said how he noticed that we prayed for the food.  He commented that food is always a gift from God and that whether it is much or a little we should always be thankful for it.

I ordered a cream soda with my lunch because I hadn’t had one in a long time.  I was shocked when it came out because it was bright green!  It tasted a little like the cream soda at home but also seemed to have a mint flavor (a trivial, but interesting cultural difference!)

The waiter was very attentive to Miranda throughout the meal and came back to give her a second kiddie prize with her meal.  Then at the end he came over and did high fives with her.   Perhaps he knew that paying lots of attention to the child usually results in a higher tip :)

After lunch we walked along the piers and the paved walking path.  It was a beautiful area and not crowded at all.   I loved the sound of the crashing waves, now we have to get Miranda used to the waves!

Miranda’s house mother told me that Miranda is scared of cats (which may be a problem since she will have a cat as a pet).  Anyway, there is a little gray cat that lives at our lodge.   It came over to our door today and Dad was petting it.  After much coaxing we were able to get Miranda to pet the cat.  She was hilarious.  She would touch the cat for a split second and then pull her hand back like she’d just been burned.  Another fear we’re going to have to work to overcome…

Having Fun

I need to perfect the technique of keeping one eye on Miranda while I am doing other things.  Yesterday, I was brushing my teeth and I turned around to see a large amount of toilet paper on the floor :)  Then she was sitting on the counter while I was slicing an apple and when I looked up she had squirted a huge glob of dish detergent on her hands.  Today we visited an Anglican church for the Sunday morning service and I experienced first hand the challenges of keeping a 2 year old occupied during the service.  She did remarkably well but it was still quite distracting to keep her quietly entertained.  Dad gave her a mint which she took out of her mouth multiple times until she was quite sticky.  Then she decided to undress the Barbie during the prayer which somehow seemed indecent.  The sermon was good but I'm not sure that I caught all the points!  Miranda is definitely keeping me on my toes...

This afternoon we got out her motorcycle for her to ride on the driveway.  She had a blast, especially because the driveway is on a slight downhill slope so she would roll down quite fast.  She makes great facial expressions and I was happy to catch a few on camera.  Of course, riding a motorcycle is hard work and she fell asleep on my lap as we were sitting outside.

Valley of 1000 Hills

We are staying near the Valley of 1000 Hills and today we drove along one of the scenic routes overlooking the valley.  The views are breathtaking  (hopefully, these photos give a glimpse and aren't distorted in some crazy way...)

The Valley of 1000 Hills is a tourist area so there are lots of cafes and craft shops.  We stopped at a few shops and did some souvenir shopping.  The Zulu people (Miranda's ethnic group) are famous for their bead work and they make beautiful bracelets, necklaces, belts, etc.   We also visited a leather shop and they had a zebra skin rug.  It was definitely not in my price range and I'm not sure I'd want to have a zebra on my floor!  Miranda was a trooper and did well in lots of little souvenir shops but we definitely have to work on the "look but don't touch" rule :)

We stopped at the grocery store and bought Miranda some beach toys which were great for the pool and the bathtub.  She is a little fish and loves to be splashing in the water.  Her favorite thing to do is to pour water from one container into another and then back again.   Miranda has started laughing a lot more and is getting much louder in the last 2 days.  She has a delightful belly laugh that makes me laugh.  I was chasing her in the yard today and she just squealed.  

Tonight we were playing "where is your nose" and she pointed to her nose and my nose, and when we were skyping with my mom she even touched the computer screen to point to Grandma's nose.

She continues to learn more English every day.  However, at the stores a lot of the shopkeepers spoke to Miranda and asked her what her name was which is not a phrase she knows.  So, we'll have to practice answering the question "what is your name".   She repeats a lot of phrases that I say and tonight she repeated "I love you".

Valley Lodge

Today we moved from the orphanage to Valley Lodge (about 40 minutes away).  We will stay here for the next 2-3 weeks as we continue to complete paperwork.  We are unable to connect to the internet from our room so I am sitting outside (in the dark) as close to the reception area as I can.

Valley Lodge is a small establishment catering to Western tourists.  Each of the 10 rooms is a suite with a living area and kitchen downstairs and a loft bedroom upstairs.   When we arrived the "fully equipped" kitchen consisted of a microwave and a small refrigerator.  On request they were able to supply us with a 2 burner stove with a mini oven (and a power strip so the refrigerator, stove, and microwave could be plugged in at the same time).  Then I had to request dishes, silverware, and glasses.  Clearly, they were not expecting guests to actually use the "fully equipped" kitchen.  We converted the desk to a table and asked for a third chair so we could all sit down to eat.

The facilities themselves are nice but are clearly not set up for 2 year old guests.  The stairs to the loft are very steep and outside is a beautiful inground swimming pool with no fence or barrier of any kind around it. 

It was a somewhat frustrating move but I think we are now supplied and will get settled in here.   Miranda was fussy all day and cried easily.  I think she was confused by the change in surroundings.  She would be playing then look around the room and see that it was different and start to cry.  I'm sure this must be very scary from her perspective.  She enjoyed being outside and we did take her for a quick splash in the pool.  Hopefully, she'll adjust to this new place quickly.

Here's a picture of Miranda waving for the camera when she was playing outside at the orphanage a few days ago.

Going Away Party

Today was the going away party for Miranda with her house mom and sisters and I have been apprehensive about it all week.  I could just see the party ending with a sobbing Miranda as the house mom and sisters left.

So, I had the "perfect plan"... make sure Miranda takes a nap and is well-rested, eat an early dinner so she does not get a sugar high off of the cookies and ice cream, and have a calm and simple party.... Well, 2 year olds do not operate off of Mommy's plan.

First of all, Miranda woke up at 5am this morning (who gets up that early, certainly not Mommy)!?!  Then this afternoon I could not get her to fall asleep for her afternoon nap.  I tried everything I could think of and finally gave up after 45 minutes.  That is when I started getting stressed about how the 6pm party would go.  Miranda then got sleepy later in the afternoon and fell asleep around 5.  So, much for my plan of an early dinner.  Miranda woke up crying a little before 6 so I quickly fed her a banana. 

Miranda seemed surprised when the house mom and sisters arrived and then she was very excited.  They gave Miranda her own "motorcycle" as a going away gift so that meant we had 3 motorcycles at the lodge.  As you can imagine this created some wild races as 3 kids at a time would ride down the long hallway on these little motorcycles that you push with your feet.  All the house sisters raced the motorcycles, even the teenagers.  It definitely was not an "orderly" game but they were quite entertained and had a lot of fun.  They also made sure that everyone got a turn, except Miranda got to ride in every race. 

Then we had cookies and ice cream for them.  Everyone loved the ice cream, especially Miranda!  (Yes, besides her banana her "dinner" consisted of 4 cookies and a scoop of ice cream which she polished off to the last drop).  The girls were very well-mannered during dessert, we later realized that one was "missing" and here she had gone to the kitchen and started washing the dishes.

After dessert we gave gifts to each one, including photos we had taken of them.  The girls were absolutely thrilled to get a gift and their faces lit up at the photos.  Watching them take their gifts out of the bags was like Christmas.  Seeing their joy made the entire event worthwhile.  Even the oldest teenager, who has been the most reserved, gave Dad a big hug and thanked him for the gift.  The entire house loves jewelry and they all left wearing new bracelets or necklaces.    We had a balloon tied to each chair and we told them they could take their balloon, if they wanted.  Everyone of them put their balloon in their bag with their present and took it home!

When they started to say goodbye, Miranda waved and said "Bye, Bye" to me thinking that she was leaving with them.  I held her and they all gave her hugs and kisses goodbye and thankfully, she did not cry when they left.   She cried a long time as I was putting her to bed and I'm sure that was a combination of the emotion, being overly tired, and all the sugar she ate!

Miranda in Pictures...

I wanted to post some photos of Miranda yesterday after the adoption was official.  However, our internet service is rather spotty (we are in a fairly remote area) and I was unsuccessful in posting photos.  Here are a few of my favorites so far, in no particular order...

Outside the Courtroom - the adoption is official

Ooh-La-La

Miranda loves to wear jewelry and play dress-up.  She has worn this necklace every day since we gave it to her.  The pink bag is a little purse that she likes to wear as a necklace.

Mommy & Miranda

The day we met Miranda (and yes, she has blue crayon on her nose!)

Visiting the Animal Park - Looking at the Bunnies with Grandpa

Adoption Day!

It's official...Miranda is my daughter!!

The court proceeding was quite simple.   I signed 2 pieces of paper and then my part was over (although my signature was much shakier than usual)!  The children's court proceeding was very informal.  We met in the magistrate's office with my lawyer, the social worker, and the orphanage directors (who wanted to witness this happy occasion).  Actually, Miranda stole the show.  As soon as we walked in she waved and said "hi" to the magistrate and he thought this was great.  The magistrate was quite personable.  He was very supportive of adoption and thanked us for giving Miranda a nuclear family.  He was also a devout Christian and asked if he could pray for us after the official proceedings were over.  His prayer was beautiful and he prayed that Miranda would be a blessing to our family and community.

Afterwards, we all went out to lunch to celebrate.  Miranda did amazingly well.  The court appointment timing meant that she missed her nap.  Then there were lots of people wanting to take her picture and we had a long wait for lunch.  She was sleepy but cheerful throughout.  (Dad was quick to point out that his children at age 2 would never have made it that long without a meltdown).

Everyone was asking me how I felt at the court appointment and I have to admit it was rather anti-climatic.  After filling out reams of paperwork to get to this point, it seemed so minor to sign two sheets of paper.  However, I did get choked up tonight when I said Miranda's bedtime prayer and prayed for my precious daughter. 

Bedtime was a highlight of the day.  As I was singing to Miranda she started singing with me for parts of "Jesus Loves Me" and "O, How I Love Jesus".  Her little voice is so sweet and it was precious to hear her say "how I love Jesus".  Then there was a funny bedtime happening.  I put Miranda in her pack'n'play and she was having trouble falling asleep so I started singing to her again.  In the middle of the song she put her finger to her mouth and whispered "Shh"!   I guess my singing was not so soothing after all :)

Legal Matters

Today we met with the legal team who has been handling all the government interactions here in South Africa.  They explained what will happen at our court hearing tomorrow.  Since it is a Children's Court it is less formal than other courts and our hearing should take about 30 minutes.  Barring any unforeseen complications the adoption will be finalized tomorrow.   Wow!  After a process of 2 years and 9 months I will officially be a mother.  YAY!

They also went through the process of what happens next - changing Miranda's name, getting her a new birth certificate and passport, etc.  They gave me a 4 page document with all the details of what form needs to be filled out when, how many certified copies I need of each document, and when I need to go to which court.   I started taking notes at the beginning but then they moved into high gear and I got a little lost in the details.  (Also, I had a "helper" with my note taking which was a little distracting.  Miranda decided she wanted to write whenever Mommy wrote something down so there are lots of scribbles all over my notebook).  They also included details like "the office manager, Ms. P, is off every Thursday so you can't go to the court on a Thursday because things go so much more smoothly when she's there".  Of course, that is valuable information to know, it was just a little overwhelming.  At least I know what I need to do tomorrow and that is the most important step!

The team was really happy to meet us and see Miranda with us.  They are the ones who actually matched Miranda with my application and they were so excited to see us interact.  Miranda was quite the ham and said "cheese" and gave big, toothy smiles for them when they took photos of her.

Exploring

This morning Miranda was awake and playing in her pack'n'play when I woke up.  I kept still and just watched her.  First, I noticed that she was scraping the sheet again and again and I couldn't figure out what she was doing.  Then, I realized she was trying to smooth out the wrinkles (which was impossible because the sheet isn't the right size for the mattress).  Then her foot hit a stuffed animal that rattled so she sat up to investigate that.  She shook the lamb but that didn't rattle, then she shook the dog and it did rattle.  Then she shook the dog really hard to see how loud it would sound.  Next, she ran her hand along the netting on the sides and tried to push her fingers in the holes.  It was fun to watch her investigate her world.

This afternoon Miranda was playing in the pot of water and doing lots of splashing.  Then disaster struck - a dog came and took a drink out of her pot!  Miranda did not like that at all.  As soon as the dog came near to us she ran over and climbed into my lap.  Then she pulled her feet up so there was no possibility of the dog touching her feet.  Even when sitting in my lap she would not reach out to touch the dog.  She was very alert to the location of the dog the rest of the time we were outside.

As Miranda spends more time with us she is quickly increasing her English vocabulary. She is also very quick to imitate what we say and do, including curling her tongue, blowing raspberries, and humming (we have to make sure we are teaching her things we really want her to learn :)

Miranda is starting to exhibit some nap avoidance techniques.  One day I read books to her until she fell asleep.  Now, she refuses to even look at a book if it is close to naptime and actually pushes the book closed.  I usually rock her and sing to her until she falls asleep, so the last two days she has run away when I went to pick her up at naptime.  Then, this afternoon she was following me and I walked into the bedroom.  As soon as she saw where we were, she tried to run back out the door but Dad was there and blocked her escape.

Miranda continues to be a big eater.  We had Swedish meatballs for dinner and she ate 5 meatballs, several scoops of noodles, and quite a few carrots.  Then when we cleared the table she found a noodle that had fallen on the floor and was ready to pop that in her mouth, too!  I went to talk with her house mom today and I asked her how she knows when Miranda has had enough to eat.  She said that Miranda will leave food on her plate and not eat anymore when she is full.  Well, this has not yet happened with us.  She always clears her plate.  We sometimes notice that she is starting to eat slower but usually she shovels it in at a pretty fast pace!

Today a social worker interviewed Dad and I to evaluate the level of bonding that Miranda has with me.  The social worker then has to write a report for the court hearing that we have this week.  Our court date was originally scheduled for Thursday but has been moved to Wednesday.  The social worker was pleased with our bonding and felt comfortable recommending that the adoption be finalized.  She was very helpful to talk to as she also adopted a toddler as a single parent and her daughter is now grown.

Animal sighting of the day...Dad, Miranda, and I walked on a trail that borders the game reserve and we startled a very large lizard that was in the grass.  It scurried across the path and into the brush so fast that there was no time for a picture.  Dad and I had a discussion on whether we saw a lizard or a crocodile but agreed it was a lizard.  We both thought it was about 3 feet in length!

Grumpy Mommy

Miranda woke up at 6:30am this morning and I definitely was not ready to get up that early.  I have not been sleeping well with her right beside me.  I wake up when she makes too much noise and I wake up when she is too quiet. 

I thought it would be good to spend some time out of the lodge today (it gets tiring being in the same building all the time and if we go outside near the road to Miranda's house she wants to go back there).  We ran errands so I could make prints of photos I took of Miranda's house sisters to give them as gifts.  We also stopped at the grocery store since we were out of Miranda's favorites - grapes & bananas.  Miranda was very wide-eyed riding around in the front of the grocery cart during her first excursion to a grocery store.

This afternoon Miranda was looking very sleepy and I was tired as well, so I laid down with her on the bed for her nap.  Well, I dozed off for a few minutes and woke up to see her there with eyes wide open.  I tried patting, singing, rocking, laying still and nothing worked to get her to fall asleep.  Meanwhile, I was feeling rather groggy and desperately wanting to sleep.  After 45 minutes of trying to get her to sleep she was becoming more awake and talking and bouncing as I rocked her.  So, I finally gave up on the idea of a nap (for her or for me).   Needless to say, this did not put me in the best frame of mind for the afternoon.  I was tired and easily annoyed.

Miranda ended up taking a catnap around 5:30 and was unhappy when she woke up around 6:00.  Dad kept her entertained while I made dinner.  She is always happy and smiling while eating, so dinner went well.  She was fine with an early bath and had fun pouring cups of water on her head!  When I put her to bed she laid down without a peep...now it is just Mommy who needs some sleep :)

Tala Game Reserve

Today we had the opportunity to visit the game reserve that borders the orphanage (remember, there is no fence between where we are staying and the game reserve...)  One of the teachers from the orphanage drove us through the reserve in a four wheel drive vehicle from the orphanage.  We saw lots of animals up close (and I mean up close)!  There are no large predators at the reserve and the animals seemed to ignore the cars.

A massive male giraffe crossed the road right in front of our car.  

We saw an entire group (herd? - I'm not sure what the right term is) of giraffes. I would guess there were at least 8, maybe 10. There were some young ones and some that were full grown. This young giraffe was lying down - isn't it cute!?!

Rhinos are massive animals when seen up close.  These 2 were drinking at the lake and then decided to come walk on the road where we were parked.  I'm glad I wasn't driving because I probably would have stalled once I knew they were walking behind us.  They then crossed to the other side of the road and continued walking through the grass.  They are definitely fierce looking animals!

Miranda's favorite animals were the zebras and she loved saying the word "zebra" :)  The babies are especially sweet.

This evening Miranda seemed sad and wanted to go see her house mom (I now recognize those words in Zulu).  Whenever we went outside she wanted to walk up the hill towards her house.  We had already invited her house sister, Andiswa,  to come play with her.  As soon as Andiswa arrived Miranda said "Bye, Bye" because she thought she was leaving with Andiswa to go back to her house.  Miranda was out of sorts and did not even want to play with Andiswa at first.  Then they had a great time playing before dinner. 

After dinner they were playing outside and I noticed that Miranda was becoming very demanding.  She would cry whenever she didn't get her way and was not sharing any toys.   She cried when I said it was time to come in.  She was clearly tired from a big day and upset about the transition to living with us.  Once inside she refused to share a book...sounds like typical two year old behavior!  I said it was time for Andiswa to go home and Miranda launched into full-scale screaming mode.  The worst thing was that another adoptive family is staying here and their little girl was spending the night for the first time tonight.  Miranda's screams caused the other little girl to start crying, too.  Dad took Andiswa home and I tried to calm Miranda down.  She was fine getting her bath and then started to scream again as soon as we walked into the bedroom.  Thankfully, the screaming didn't last long. She was definitely one tired little girl and finally settled down and went to sleep.

Sleeping!

Shhh!  Miranda is sleeping.  Yes, Miranda is spending the night with us for the first time.  It took a little while for her to fall asleep and I sang every song I could think of but there wasn't too much crying.  Yay!  This is an answer to prayer because I was definitely nervous about how it would go when she realized she wasn't going back to her house to sleep.

This morning we visited a "baby orphanage" where Miranda lived about a year ago.  The caregivers were happy to see Miranda and how much she has grown.  They were also pleased to meet us.  It was helpful to learn more about her early life and see the excellent care she received.  The orphanage was founded by a Christian couple and right now there are 8 or 9 children living there from ages 2 weeks to about 1 year.  They said they have cared for about 600 children in the last 14-15 years.  The orphanage was bright and cheery and very clean.  It was in a much wealthier area.  The houses were high on a cliff overlooking the Indian Ocean.  I have attached a photo that I took from the car as we drove past.

Today was a hot day, so we put on Miranda's swimsuit and let her play in the water from the hose.  I don't think she had ever done this before, so there was not as much splashing as this activity normally involves.  However, she seemed quite happy to stand there in the spray from the hose.

We were trying to keep Miranda busy and distracted this evening so she wouldn't be upset about staying here.  Thankfully, we found two activities that were big hits.  First, we gave her some play jewelry, including earrings that reached her shoulders.  She loved the jewelry and wore it the rest of the night (having older house sisters has influenced this interest!)  Then Dad found some musical instruments - tambourines and maracas.  She loved playing with these and we started marching around the lodge.  The lodge has a very long hall so we marched up and down it again and again.  It was a wonderful distraction and I have a feeling that this game will happen many more times. 

I gave Miranda a bath before bed - the American version of bathtime.  When I helped with Miranda's bath at her house I noticed that there was no play - it was just get in the tub, get washed, and get out.  So, I gave her different toys to play with in the tub and she loved pouring water on herself and from one container to the next.  With that success it was time for bed.  Miranda is sleeping in a "camp cot"  (i.e. pack-n-play) beside my bed.  Let's hope she sleeps well all night.

Grumpy Miranda

Today was a fairly quiet day at home.  This morning Miranda seemed rather grumpy.  She did not want to play with any of her toys.  In fact, she picked up the toys and put them away.  If you tried to interest her in something she would take it and put it back where it belonged.  Dad and I thought this was rather funny so I picked up a picture book and took it over to the couch to see what she would do.  She came right over to me, took the book, and put it back where it belonged!  Then I opened the Duplo blocks and started putting a few together.  She came over, put the blocks back in the bag, and then zipped the bag shut. 

We though she was hilarious.  Other two year olds throw toys or lay on the floor and kick and scream when they are fussy and mad.  Not Miranda, she put all the toys away and if she was not going to play with them, then no one was going to play with them!  This is definitely a trait I hope she keeps :)

Actually, we finally realized that she was tired.  I picked her up and held her in my lap and she fell asleep within minutes.

We went for a walk this afternoon.  We walked past a chicken coop and I absently started counting the chickens and Miranda started counting with me.  She clearly has practiced counting in English in preschool.  Throughout the rest of the walk I would count to ten and she would echo me.  Then we would cheer every time we got to ten.

Miranda was the most happy and animated as we were making dinner.  She was running from room to room laughing.  She would run into the kitchen to see what I was doing then run back out.  Setting and clearing the table is still one of her favorite activities.

After dinner we walked up the hill back to her house.  She was laughing and happily yelling the same phrase over and over again.  Another girl walked down to meet us and I asked her what Miranda was saying.  She said Miranda was yelling "mom, mom" over and over.  Miranda knew that we were walking back to her house and that she would see her house mother.  Even though I know that it is best that Miranda is strongly attached to her house mother, I long for the day when she will be that excited to see me.  Of course, when she got to the house she ran in and ran right past her house mother in order to see what the other girls were eating in the kitchen.

As I left Miranda's house, Andiswa was waiting outside to walk with me.  I told her that Miranda is going to start sleeping with us tomorrow and Andiswa asked if she could sleep with us, too.  I had to tell her that she can't stay with us but I did say we would invite her to come play with Miranda.  The emotions of this transition are hard to handle.  I know Miranda will be upset when she can't see her house mom and sisters and I know they will miss her, too.

Visiting the Animal Park

Today we took Miranda to the "Duck and Deck" Animal Park (i.e. petting zoo).  The owner of the park is a long-time supporter of the orphanage.  Miranda got to see lots of new animals at the park.  They had different varieties of ducks, geese, and chickens, as well as pigs, goats, burros, emus, cows, donkeys, ponies, rabbits, and a few others.  At first Miranda was rather timid.  She would step back whenever the animals came near the fence.  Then two young goats managed to climb out of their pens and come beg for food (each child received a bag of pellet feed).  Miranda definitely did not like the goats coming right up to her and wanted me to hold her away from them.  However, she got really excited when she saw the rabbits.  After seeing the rabbits she was much more interested in all the other animals.  (She even watched the young goats as they climbed on the slide at the playground but was still a little shy of them).  She also seemed to like the pigs.  We fed the pigs a banana peel and she thought this was great.  Then she "helped" feed the burro some of the pellet feed.  Dad would give her a handful of pellets and she would hand them to me and I would feed the burro.  She wanted to feed the pellets herself but wouldn't open up the palm of her hand.  We also noticed that she tried a few pellets to see how they tasted (even though I tried to stop her from putting them in her mouth).  Ugh!

Miranda has definitely gotten comfortable riding in her car seat and climbed right up into it this morning.  She dozed off in the seat both to and from the animal park.

I took some photos of houses that we pass as we leave the orphanage.  Most of the houses are rectangular, but some are round.  Some people believe that evil spirits lurk in the corners of the house so they build a round house.

Favorite Traffic Sign

Here is Dad's favorite traffic sign:

Any guesses on what it means or when it is used?

A Case of the Grouchies

South Africa has one of the largest gaps between rich and poor of any country in the world.  We experienced a piece of that as we went shopping today.  As we left the orphanage we drove through a "township".  These were segregated areas for non-whites that were established during apartheid.  Large groups of people were forcibly settled on small amounts of land with limited services (i.e. electricity, running water, sewage disposal, etc).  Today many people live in these areas, constrained by socioeconomic factors.

Thousands of small homes dot the landscape.

In contrast, the shopping mall was similar to an indoor mall in the US.  Prices at the grocery store were just as high as prices in the US.  The majority of patrons at the mall were white. 

By the way, going shopping was a major success for Dad - he successfully navigated driving on the left side of the road on a major highway!

We went shopping in the morning because Miranda had a doctor's appointment.  When we picked up Miranda in the early afternoon she was outside playing.  She happily came with us but as we were walking away she heard her house mom call "Goodbye".  After seeing her house mom there was no way she wanted to come with us.  So, I carried a kicking, screaming, squirming two year old down the road to the lodge.  She calmed down as we walked and played for awhile in the pot of water.  Then she got fussy and grouchy again.  She looked really sleepy but was having a hard time falling asleep.  She would push away all her toys and books and look miserable.  Finally, she fell asleep.  It was late in the afternoon but she clearly needed a nap.  I only let her sleep an hour and she was grouchy again when I woke her up. 

Miranda stayed for dinner for the first time and I had her help set the table by carrying the silverware, cups, condiments, etc. from the kitchen to the dining room.  She found this to be great fun and would run down the hall to get the next item.  Finally, she was back to her cheerful self!  Dinner was a new adventure as she discovered ketchup. She would dip her French fry in ketchup, suck the ketchup off, then dip the same fry back in the ketchup.  We had to keep re-filling her plate with ketchup.  Most of the food she eats is very bland, so ketchup was a treat!  After dinner she had a great time clearing the table and bringing things back to the kitchen.  All the items she would hand to me, except she would give the plates a little toss.  One ended up on the floor, but did not break :)

After dinner she rode the little motorcycle, chattering the entire time.  She talked non-stop on the way back to her house.  It is a night and day difference between when she is happy and grouchy.

Splashing!

More animal sightings today!

And no, there is not a fence between us and the giraffe (there is a fence around the children's houses but not the lodge where we are staying).  We also saw 8 monkeys run across the backyard and into the trees, this is not the best picture but you get the idea...

Miranda discovered a new game today...SPLASHING!  A large pot of water was left outside and playing in it became a great game.  We gave her cups and bowls and she spent hours playing in the water, making mud, getting wet...  She was very animated, all smiles, and lots of chatter.  She would give me a cup to "drink" and then would take a drink herself.  I tried to prevent her from drinking the water from the pot (since there were sticks and dirt in it) but soon gave up.  Somehow drinking water from the pot was half the fun.  She was so excited by this that she did not take a morning nap. As a result she fell asleep at lunch in between bites of yogurt (literally).  After her nap we took her for a walk in a borrowed all-terrain stroller.  Then we spent another hour playing in the pot of water again (and soaked her second outfit of the day).  It was great fun to play with her and see her so entertained.  I love to see her smile, it lights up her entire face.

This afternoon she started repeating after me in English such as "green grass", "sky", "yellow flowers".  I would point to an object and say its name several times and she would repeat it. And when I ask her a question there are times when she'll say "Yesh" and it seems like she really means "Yes".  Dad looked up a Zulu/English translator online and we tried to figure out some words that she repeats a lot.  However, we were unsuccessful.  Her house mom said that she often only pronounces the first part of a word (which of course does not work for an online translator :) 

Bedtime was still the hardest part of the day.  Tonight went better than last night, especially because Andiswa played with her while I gave her a bath and got her ready for bed.  There a few tears but not many.

Sunday School

Today was a bit cool - it dropped into the 70's this morning and the children were wearing jackets and sweaters :) 

We went to the orphanage Sunday School this morning.  The service was student led, including older children who got the younger ones to obey the rules (such as you're not allowed to sit on the lap of visiting adults during the service).  A teenage boy led the service (opened in prayer, introduced each part of the service, read the Scripture, etc).  Several teenage boys played keyboard and drums and several teenage girls led the singing. One girl would sing a phrase and then everyone else would sing the phrase back.  The children were very enthusiastic in their singing so it made for a lively service.  There was a testimony time (we think) where several youngsters (approx. ages 7-12) went to the front and each spoke briefly in Zulu.  The audience said "Amen" at the end of each one.  There was an offering time where the children went forward and put their offering on the plate, including one little tot who plunked her coin down on the table but didn't quite get it on the plate.  If you want to feel humbled, you should watch orphans giving their offerings to God.  I know that from the children's perspectives I've probably done lots of odd things over the last few days.  So, getting choked up during the offering time just got added to the list.   The younger children were then dismissed and a pastor gave the sermon.  He spoke in both Zulu and English so it was easy to follow.  The service ended with a processional where we all shook the hands of the worship team and pastor and filed out.  Miranda, my champion sleeper, slept through the entire service.

Miranda started showing more opinions today and if there was something she didn't want to play with she would push it away.  We took her for another car ride this afternoon and this time we buckled her in completely.  She did fine in the car seat.   The biggest challenges were the road "hazards"  including lots of people walking down the side/middle of the road.  We also had to wait for 20 or so cattle to cross the road.  There were several large bulls with wide horns and we definitely did not want a close encounter with any of them.  There was also a "police stop" set up at an intersection complete with multiple police cars and officers.  We couldn't really tell who they were stopping and were just glad they didn't stop us!

Our general "schedule" is to have Miranda for most of the day and then take her back to her house at 4:30pm.  We then go back to her house at 7:30pm to help with her bath and bedtime.  Tonight when we arrived Dad's little playmate was happy to see us, Miranda was not. Her house mom told her to come to me and she started to cry.  So, basically, the house mom and a house sister each held a hand and drug her to me. I cuddled her until she stopped crying and then she sat beside me.  She was looking sleepy so I held her again and she dozed off. The problem was that she was not ready for bed.  So, by the time she was ready for bed she was inconsolable and could not get settled.  It is so hard to see her upset and know that this transition will be filled with loss for her.

House Sisters

I'm not sure what the view out of your dining room window is, but here is what we saw out of our window today.

Warthogs are so funny looking they just make me laugh :)

One of the things we're learning on this trip is that child-rearing practices and safety standards are definitely different in South Africa.  We went to pick up Miranda this morning around 8am and her house mom had already left (she must get time off on Saturdays) so the older girls were watching the younger ones.  Miranda's favorite house sister is Andiswa  and I believe that Andiswa provides a lot of care for Miranda.  So, we made "arrangements" with Andiswa (I'm guessing that she is 10) on how long we were keeping Miranda.  Andiswa said she would come get Miranda at 11am.

Here is a photo of Miranda's house. 

There are approximately 20 houses at the orphanage, each with 6 children of varying ages.  One section of the property has the girls' houses and the other side is for the boys.

When we brought Miranda to the lodge she was very quiet and lethargic.  I think she missed all the activity and playing with the house sisters (the other days when we went to get Miranda the sisters were in school).  But then she started looking sleepy and fell asleep around 9am.  (I still can't quite figure out when she usually sleeps - Thursday she didn't have a morning nap, Friday she fell asleep at 11am, today was 9am.  Supposedly, she just takes a nap whenever she wants.  I know we let her sleep too long yesterday afternoon because she did NOT want to go to bed last night).

When she woke up she was a little more active and started riding the motorcycle up and down the hall.  She even got going fast enough that she crashed into the wall and fell off.  She started crying when she fell, which was good, because she usually is so quiet and doesn't seem to cry at much.

Then Andiswa came at 11am and played with Miranda.  Miranda was very excited and animated.  She chattered constantly.  Andiswa's English is good enough that she was able to translate for us.  Andiswa was exceeding polite and acted like a little mommy, putting Miranda first as they played.  They rode the motorcycle, played with balloons, built towers out of blocks, played with play-doh, etc.  We also played with bubbles.  After much blowing (and spitting) Miranda learned how to blow bubbles!!  There was a little squabble when Andiswa was on the motorcycle and Miranda wanted to be on it.  Another good sign of normal 2 year old behavior!  Andiswa said that Miranda pointed at the bike and said "MINE".

Andiswa and Miranda ate lunch with us (I never quite understood what the "plan" was but Andiswa seemed happy to be invited.  This was the first meal we've had with Miranda.)  When we sat down I said I would pray.  Andiswa said that Miranda knew how to pray and told her to pray.  Miranda prayed a short prayer but the only part I understood was "amen".  We found a food Miranda doesn't like - apple slices were definitely not a big hit.  However, chicken got gobbled down.   Miranda stuffed at least 5 pieces of chicken breast in her mouth until her cheeks were full!  I told her she needed to chew and swallow before taking more (and thankfully, Andiswa was able to translate that).  We asked Andiswa what Miranda's favorite foods are and she said meat - chicken or beef.  I have a feeling that meat is a special treat here.

Some other girls came to get Andiswa in the early afternoon.  We kept Miranda and she had another nap.  She is the sweetest thing when she falls asleep.  She was looking sleepy so I held her in my lap and read a book.  She just snuggled against me and went to sleep.  When I woke her up she was still very sleepy and wrapped her arms and legs and around me.  She is so fun to cuddle.

Another safety practice that is different here is that car seats are not used.  Miranda has ridden in a car to go to doctor's appointments but has not ridden in a car seat.  Today we took a drive out the dirt road to the end of the orphanage property to start getting Miranda used to the car seat.  We didn't buckle her in, we just had her sit in the seat.  Her eyes were really big and she seemed scared when we got in the car but she didn't make a peep.  She was quite excited when we came back and pulled into the parking area near her house and she could see other kids running around.

When we got back we walked to her house and it was empty.  The other house sisters were playing outside and some kids said the house mom would be back in "10 minutes".  Miranda went over to one of her older house sisters and was with her.  It felt odd but we left her to play with the other kids knowing that the older girls are used to watching the younger.  Miranda's house sisters are quite special and I know she will have a hard time adjusting to not having them.

Adoption Adventures

I would love to post some photos of Miranda but I cannot post photos of her until the adoption is finalized at our court date on January 26.  So, I thought I'd show this beauty instead.

We allowed Miranda to play hookie from pre-school today so she could play with us all morning.  We borrowed a pink motorcycle that she could ride and push with her feet.  There is a long hallway in the lodge where we are staying and she had a great time riding the motorcycle up and down the hallway.  She became much more adventurous throughout the morning and rode as fast as she could.  She chattered away and laughed as she played. 

After a few hours of playing she started yawning and looking sleepy.  I picked her up and cuddled her on my lap and she was asleep within a minute (literally)!  The motorcycle riding must have worn her out.  She slept curled up against me for over an hour.  We finally woke her up when it was time to go back to her house for lunch.  She was fast asleep and it took some time to actually get her to wake up.

At lunch I asked the house mom if there were any foods she disliked and the mom said she eats anything you give her.  This has been our experience, too, as she has eaten everything we've given her.  We were going to give her half a banana this morning and she ate the whole thing!  Hopefully, she'll like American food.

I think Miranda's morning nap threw off her schedule because she usually naps right after lunch.  When we picked her up to play later in the afternoon all the other kids reported that she had not taken a nap.  She came and played with a doll for a little while before she started yawning.  I laid on the bed with her and she fell asleep for another hour.  Today was definitely the day for sleeping!!  At least I got to catch up on some sleep I'm not getting due to jet lag!

Dad and I had a new adventure today.  We both did a practice drive on the left hand side of the road.  We stayed on the back roads near the orphanage just so we could get the hang of it.  We both found that we were driving too close to the left side of the road.  Dad had the biggest challenge as school had just let out and there were over 100 kids standing in the street.  They divided in half so we could drive through but then as we were moving forward a little girl darted back across the street to join the other side.  Whew! That was a heart-stopping moment but Dad handled it very calmly.

Here's the orphanage sign from the road.

Bedtime

We went to Miranda's house for bedtime tonight. She was sporting a new haircut (a.k.a. buzzcut) and was just finishing her bath. I put on her pajamas and then rocked her to sleep. She was asleep within 5 minutes (I'm not expecting this success on a regular basis :)

Meanwhile, the older girls were playing with Dad and asking if they could come with us, too. They even got out the photo album I sent and talked about how big Miranda's room is. The one little girl was begging to come along. How do you explain to a 6 year old or a 13 year old why she can't come and have a Grandma and Grandpa? How do you explain why Miranda gets her own room in a big house while they are living with 3 girls in one bedroom? The children here are absolutely adorable and the hardest thing is knowing that only one is getting a permanent family.

Miranda's Mommy

The definition of jet lag = being wide awake at 2am and not being able to turn off your mind. Yes, I spent several hours wide awake in the middle of the night. Then I finally fell asleep and overslept in the morning! Dad said he was awake at the same time, too.

This morning we went to Miranda's house and as soon as she saw me she raised her arms so I would pick her up! Some language is universal!

One of the little girls was fascinated by dad's beard and kept touching it. We tried to see if Miranda would touch his beard but she wasn't too sure about that!

We went with Miranda to her pre-school class today. There were 15 children ranging in age from 2 to 4 or 5. They started with singing (with varied amounts of participation from the kids). Miranda clapped her hands but did not do too much singing. Then the teacher taught them different colors in English. The teacher asked them to find items in the room that were different colors. One little boy came over to me and pointed out that I had a green shirt one. Then some of the kids realized that Dad and I had blue eyes and seemed quite fascinated with that. Miranda is one of the youngest children and is a little shy. Some of the others were more outgoing and loved to get attention from us. I sat on the floor during playtime and my lap was always full. The kids were pushing each other to be able to sit with me.

We did some grocery shopping today so we would have supplies for the next 2 weeks. The orphanage is definitely off the beaten path - it took about 40 minutes to get to the grocery store. Dad has been trying to learn the directions and is frustrated that the roads to the orphanage are not on any map (nor do they have names or road signs).

The orphanage is next to a game reserve and we saw a giraffe up on the hill when we came back from shopping! Dad also saw a reebok (and no, not a shoe) when he was walking to our lodge. The wildlife is definitely a little more exotic than we're used to :)

This afternoon we went to play with Miranda and a whole group of kids rushed up to tell us where she was. We were excited because they were calling me 'mommy' but then some of them were calling dad 'mommy' too! I guess it is a little hard for them to know what the title really means. As soon as Miranda saw me she gave a big smile and lifted her arms to be picked up.

We played at our lodge and Miranda seemed a little hesitant at first. She would snuggle in my lap and look all around with big eyes. We played ball and were clapping whenever she threw it. Soon she was clapping for herself, too. Grandpa gave her a cup of cut-up grapes and that was a big hit! She was very deliberate and only took one at time but she ate them all. By the time we started playing with blocks she was much more animated and talkative. Unfortunately, our Zulu is still non-existent so we have no idea what she said.

When we went back to her house she started walking up the hill. However, when I stopped and held out my hands she quickly decided to be carried. I certainly got a good workout as it is a pretty steep hill and it is quite hot. I will be in better shape when we return :)

Meeting Miranda

We arrived safely in Durban, South Africa at noon on Wednesday.  It is hot and humid here, the middle of summer (sorry to rub that in to all you Marylanders).  The flights went smoothly and all the connections were fine.  We did not get much sleep on the plane and by the time we arrived we had been up for over 24 hours.  We were met by two members of the orphanage staff in the early afternoon.  They were very accommodating in helping us get our rental car and one drove our car back to the orphanage.  The orphanage is over an hour away from the airport and I did not feel comfortable driving when we were so tired.  South Africans drive on the left side of the road and there were limited road signs once we left the main highway so we were very pleased to have a driver who knew what they were doing!

We drove through beautiful country to reach the orphanage.  The land is very hilly (the orphanage is located in an area called “The land of a thousand hills”) and green. 

 

We drove by some townships where there are hundreds, if not thousands of small houses (or shacks) built close together.  Then there would be acres of green rolling hills.  As we drove to the orphanage we saw many children walking home from school, each one dressed in their school uniform.  The kids cut across the hills on red dirt walking paths or walked along the roads we were driving. 

We reached the Lily of the Valley Orphanage and saw a collection of buildings amongst the hills. We first passed  greenhouses where they are growing tomatoes and then the  computer center.  Then we drove by the classrooms for the elementary school before entering the actual orphanage section of the property.  There we saw a cluster of basic, block buildings.  Each building houses 6 children and a house mom.  We are staying at a conference center on the orphanage property.  There are dormitory style bedrooms, along with a kitchen, dining room, and lounge.  Another family also arrived today to adopt a 4 year old little girl.

The highlight of the day was meeting Miranda.  Everyone was asking if I was excited to meet her but I was more nervous than excited.  The social worker and house mom brought her to me.  Miranda came easily into my arms, but once the social worker and house mom drove away the tears started.  Miranda definitely did not like being left with two strangers!  We walked around a little while and tried to soothe her.  Then the orphanage director’s wife came over with some toys and a piece of cheese. Miranda nibbled on the cheese and started playing with a toy piano.  She spent the next 30-40 minutes sitting on my lap and playing with the toys.   She was still hesitant but she seemed content as we scribbled with crayons.  One time she spoke to us very clearly, but we did not understand Zulu to know what she said.

When we took Miranda back to her house for dinner she put her arms around my neck and snuggled into my chest.  I patted her as we walked and with her little hand she patted me back.  Once we arrived back at her house she was much more animated and began playing with dolls with some other girls.  She waved goodbye when we left and the house mother got her to say “Ma mee”.

Wow!  The excitement came after I held her in my arms.  I can’t wait to spend time with her tomorrow!

Paperwork Completed

All the i's are dotted and the t's are crossed - my paperwork was officially apostilled by the state this morning!  (And thanks to Annie, my wonderful chauffeur, I was not stressed by this last minute excursion).

Paperwork Approval

Great News!  The US governement approved my adoption paperwork yesterday.  I still need to go to the State Courthouse in Annapolis on Monday to have copies of the documents officially "sealed"  (apostilled) by the state.   Cutting it this close to the wire has certainly added some extra stress to my life.  Both the government case worker and my adoption agency jumped through lots of hoops to make this happen before I leave.  Praise God!

1 week countdown

In one week from today my Dad and I will be on a plane to South Africa.  So many emotions are swirling through my mind as I prepare to be a mother.  The last few weeks have been busy with preparations - booking plane tickets, hotels, rental cars, filling prescriptions for malaria medicine, arranging details at work, and child-proofing my house.  In all the busyness it is hard to process that this adorable little girl named Miranda is about to become my child.